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Your princess is in another fairytale: W.I.T.C.H.
The Princess Revealed (Andrew Nicholls and Darrell Vickers): Previously on W.I.T.C.H.: Cedric uses a magic rock to locate the missing Princess, who is Elyon, and Akino loses her shit at the “never use your powers for personal gain” moral.
I admit, I was pretty apprehensive about reviewing this episode after the headdesk-fest that was the previous one. It’s pretty suspenseful, and I’d argue this is probably where Disney made the push to make it a Jetix series. The first half of the story really focuses on Vathek, who learns that Elyon is the Princess and makes a break for Earth, and Cedric and Phobos finally get a clue and go after him as the spy. I really hope they apologized profusely to Raythor for the whole misunderstanding in episode 3. There’s a chase scene and everything with Vathek and Blunk trying to get to the portal to warn Caleb, running from Cedric, guards, and a bug-thing (as Blunk so eloquently put it) called a Larvek.
Meanwhile, the girls learn that Elyon is dating a new boy, and we’re also beginning to set up one of our official couples when out of nowhere, Kevin discovers he loves Gwen…wait, no, I’m mixing up Greg Cipes’s roles again. Either way, the Caleb/Cornelia googly eyes were very sudden. While she’s putting iodine on his cuts. Burning, stinging iodine. Also, Caleb argues that Earth Girls Make No Sense again when he says that he doesn’t get how Elyon has to have a boyfriend, and says on his latest episode of “On Meridian We…” dating is a matter of asking out people you actually like. So, I’m guessing that dating is taken very seriously there. Makes sense when you consider this is a medieval-based culture. Dating = formal courtship.
Two formal rifts begin to develop here when the Guardians learn that Elyon is the Princess. First and most obvious is between Will and Cornelia, which will last for a few episodes. Cornelia is horrified by this truth and refuses to fight her best friend when it comes to it (also, there is a very strange thing indicated by the animation and script when Corny describes Elyon’s perfect man as a tall, blue-eyed, long-haired blonde, and they focus on her long hair a little too long). Though to be perfectly honest, there’s no indication that they have to fight Elyon. At least not yet. Caleb and Vathek know that the people of Meridian are hoping that someday their Princess will come because anything is better than Phobos, and Yan Lin says that they just have to beware of Phobos trying to coerce Elyon to the dark side. Why not just tell Elyon that they discovered she has a royal brother who will try to manipulate and hurt her? Or hell, just go to her parents and suggest that they start to have this talk with her? Cornelia even argues that they should tell Elyon all of this to save her, and Will argues that it just sounds too crazy. THEN GO TO HER FUCKING PARENTS AND LET THEM TAKE CARE OF IT. They’ve got to have been prepared for this day, given how long they’ve been in hiding!
The second rift is between Elyon and the girls, since their attempts at spying on her are so disastrous that it causes her new boyfriend to break up with her. Though, to be fair, this was one of their better attempts. They mostly seemed more like they wanted to see how the date was going. Oh, and that Caleb was a crazy jealous would-be suitor. But he only approached them once on-screen, so that couldn’t have factored into it much. Elyon’s boyfriend just doesn’t like her friends. But this heartbreak for a boy she only just started going out with (she’s a preteen, I’ll let it slide) leads her right to Cedric for totally squicky when you think about it comfort. Seriously, why does nobody ever report him to the feds? Everything about him says predator!
Stop the Presses (Lisa Rosenthal): There’s really nothing to write home about with this one. The B plot focuses on Cedric and Phobos being creepy as they try to get samples of Elyon’s body, mind, and spirit for the Ritual of Amalgamation, to try to lower her defenses against them. Though it’s not like she’s really resisting anything. They get her hairbrush (with hair) for body, a perfect score on a test for mind, and they spend the rest of the episode trying to get a sample of her breath for spirit. So in her infinite wisdom that cannot be questioned because she’s the leader and what she says goes (pretty much Yan Lin’s words), Will puts Blunk in charge of protecting Elyon. Yes, Yan Lin. Because completely trusting the bearer of the Heart of Kandrakar to always have the best judgment worked out so well in the past.
The A plot is filler. A creature whose name I’m not even going to attempt to spell (it looks like a warthog with googly eyes, okay?) is running rampant in Sheffield, spewing purple slime. And it’s invisible. Taranee volunteers to take over the school paper as the new editor-in-chief, with Irma getting roped into it by mistake, and her attempts to get the rest of the staff to tackle some real journalism results in Martin—who reports like he’s at a festival, going from stall to stall—to try to track down the Sheffield “ghost” that is sliming the school. Dude, just hire Egon, Ray, Winston, and Peter. When the girls and Caleb learn what’s really going on, they distract Martin by using Irma as bait, having her take him out on a date, much to her chagrin. Sure, there’s a bit at the end where she admits she didn’t have as horrible a time as she expected and even kissed him on the cheek, but this is all forgotten throughout the rest of the series. If you’re an Irma/Martin shipper, wait till season 2.
It’s really nothing to write home about, especially after the much more engaging “The Princess Revealed.” It continues the plot, but it’s filler at the same time. Go figure.
Parent’s Night [sic] (Lisa Rosenthal) Right off the bat, I notice that the theme sounds a little different. The theme they’d been playing up until now was the version they have on the CD. For some reason, the singer was switched now, sounding slightly deeper and I guess more aggressive, like it’s a battle theme.
Okay, rant time. I love how Principal Knickerbocker goes with the idea of having every student form a family tree with photos, without any regard for students who may be adopted. Or otherwise have less than ideal nuclear family setups. Because Elyon can’t be the only one with no info on her chart. What about the foster kids? What about kids being raised by other family members? They’re going to have gaps in their information and photos too. Let’s take Caleb as a totally hypothetical example. Let’s say that he’s attending. He’d only have information on his father, since he doesn’t even know who his mother is. This is not a completely out-there possibility. Modern families come in all types: birth families, adopted families, foster families, single-parent households, raised by other relatives, cohabitation, being afraid to explain why you have two people of the same gender whom you call your parents… Hell, I’m surprised that Will’s mom didn’t object to having to put information on her ex-husband on the chart because she’s not supposed to like him at all.
Also, when Caleb gets a clue at who Cedric really is. Really? Are Clark Kent glasses that effective at hiding an identity?
The Ritual of Amalgamation creates a crown for Elyon and makes her totally immune to logic, so she begins getting very upset at her friends and parents. Who really make it worse by not being honest with her. I mean, at the very least, her parents could have said a long time ago, “Sweetie, you’re adopted. We brought you here from a very bad place with people who wanted to hurt you. You have an older brother who is one of them.” After all, it’s not like tragedy doesn’t happen on Earth at all. She’d be able to understand that at least, that there are people who come from abusive families or that there are war-torn or poverty-stricken nations. And the weakened resistance only lasts for a short time, so anything that could boost it would be a major help.
As Elyon breaks from her friends and unwittingly becomes her brother’s pawn, Cornelia and Will form a deeper rift. Cornelia blames Will for not letting her tell Elyon the truth, since lying to her worked so well.
There’s a mostly filler battle where the team is shrunk down and stuck in a Terrarium of Evil, but to be perfectly honest, they’re obligated to throw in a battle now that it’s an action series. It kind of slows things down toward the end, especially given how intense the character story went.
I admit, I was pretty apprehensive about reviewing this episode after the headdesk-fest that was the previous one. It’s pretty suspenseful, and I’d argue this is probably where Disney made the push to make it a Jetix series. The first half of the story really focuses on Vathek, who learns that Elyon is the Princess and makes a break for Earth, and Cedric and Phobos finally get a clue and go after him as the spy. I really hope they apologized profusely to Raythor for the whole misunderstanding in episode 3. There’s a chase scene and everything with Vathek and Blunk trying to get to the portal to warn Caleb, running from Cedric, guards, and a bug-thing (as Blunk so eloquently put it) called a Larvek.
Meanwhile, the girls learn that Elyon is dating a new boy, and we’re also beginning to set up one of our official couples when out of nowhere, Kevin discovers he loves Gwen…wait, no, I’m mixing up Greg Cipes’s roles again. Either way, the Caleb/Cornelia googly eyes were very sudden. While she’s putting iodine on his cuts. Burning, stinging iodine. Also, Caleb argues that Earth Girls Make No Sense again when he says that he doesn’t get how Elyon has to have a boyfriend, and says on his latest episode of “On Meridian We…” dating is a matter of asking out people you actually like. So, I’m guessing that dating is taken very seriously there. Makes sense when you consider this is a medieval-based culture. Dating = formal courtship.
Two formal rifts begin to develop here when the Guardians learn that Elyon is the Princess. First and most obvious is between Will and Cornelia, which will last for a few episodes. Cornelia is horrified by this truth and refuses to fight her best friend when it comes to it (also, there is a very strange thing indicated by the animation and script when Corny describes Elyon’s perfect man as a tall, blue-eyed, long-haired blonde, and they focus on her long hair a little too long). Though to be perfectly honest, there’s no indication that they have to fight Elyon. At least not yet. Caleb and Vathek know that the people of Meridian are hoping that someday their Princess will come because anything is better than Phobos, and Yan Lin says that they just have to beware of Phobos trying to coerce Elyon to the dark side. Why not just tell Elyon that they discovered she has a royal brother who will try to manipulate and hurt her? Or hell, just go to her parents and suggest that they start to have this talk with her? Cornelia even argues that they should tell Elyon all of this to save her, and Will argues that it just sounds too crazy. THEN GO TO HER FUCKING PARENTS AND LET THEM TAKE CARE OF IT. They’ve got to have been prepared for this day, given how long they’ve been in hiding!
The second rift is between Elyon and the girls, since their attempts at spying on her are so disastrous that it causes her new boyfriend to break up with her. Though, to be fair, this was one of their better attempts. They mostly seemed more like they wanted to see how the date was going. Oh, and that Caleb was a crazy jealous would-be suitor. But he only approached them once on-screen, so that couldn’t have factored into it much. Elyon’s boyfriend just doesn’t like her friends. But this heartbreak for a boy she only just started going out with (she’s a preteen, I’ll let it slide) leads her right to Cedric for totally squicky when you think about it comfort. Seriously, why does nobody ever report him to the feds? Everything about him says predator!
Stop the Presses (Lisa Rosenthal): There’s really nothing to write home about with this one. The B plot focuses on Cedric and Phobos being creepy as they try to get samples of Elyon’s body, mind, and spirit for the Ritual of Amalgamation, to try to lower her defenses against them. Though it’s not like she’s really resisting anything. They get her hairbrush (with hair) for body, a perfect score on a test for mind, and they spend the rest of the episode trying to get a sample of her breath for spirit. So in her infinite wisdom that cannot be questioned because she’s the leader and what she says goes (pretty much Yan Lin’s words), Will puts Blunk in charge of protecting Elyon. Yes, Yan Lin. Because completely trusting the bearer of the Heart of Kandrakar to always have the best judgment worked out so well in the past.
The A plot is filler. A creature whose name I’m not even going to attempt to spell (it looks like a warthog with googly eyes, okay?) is running rampant in Sheffield, spewing purple slime. And it’s invisible. Taranee volunteers to take over the school paper as the new editor-in-chief, with Irma getting roped into it by mistake, and her attempts to get the rest of the staff to tackle some real journalism results in Martin—who reports like he’s at a festival, going from stall to stall—to try to track down the Sheffield “ghost” that is sliming the school. Dude, just hire Egon, Ray, Winston, and Peter. When the girls and Caleb learn what’s really going on, they distract Martin by using Irma as bait, having her take him out on a date, much to her chagrin. Sure, there’s a bit at the end where she admits she didn’t have as horrible a time as she expected and even kissed him on the cheek, but this is all forgotten throughout the rest of the series. If you’re an Irma/Martin shipper, wait till season 2.
It’s really nothing to write home about, especially after the much more engaging “The Princess Revealed.” It continues the plot, but it’s filler at the same time. Go figure.
Parent’s Night [sic] (Lisa Rosenthal) Right off the bat, I notice that the theme sounds a little different. The theme they’d been playing up until now was the version they have on the CD. For some reason, the singer was switched now, sounding slightly deeper and I guess more aggressive, like it’s a battle theme.
Okay, rant time. I love how Principal Knickerbocker goes with the idea of having every student form a family tree with photos, without any regard for students who may be adopted. Or otherwise have less than ideal nuclear family setups. Because Elyon can’t be the only one with no info on her chart. What about the foster kids? What about kids being raised by other family members? They’re going to have gaps in their information and photos too. Let’s take Caleb as a totally hypothetical example. Let’s say that he’s attending. He’d only have information on his father, since he doesn’t even know who his mother is. This is not a completely out-there possibility. Modern families come in all types: birth families, adopted families, foster families, single-parent households, raised by other relatives, cohabitation, being afraid to explain why you have two people of the same gender whom you call your parents… Hell, I’m surprised that Will’s mom didn’t object to having to put information on her ex-husband on the chart because she’s not supposed to like him at all.
Also, when Caleb gets a clue at who Cedric really is. Really? Are Clark Kent glasses that effective at hiding an identity?
The Ritual of Amalgamation creates a crown for Elyon and makes her totally immune to logic, so she begins getting very upset at her friends and parents. Who really make it worse by not being honest with her. I mean, at the very least, her parents could have said a long time ago, “Sweetie, you’re adopted. We brought you here from a very bad place with people who wanted to hurt you. You have an older brother who is one of them.” After all, it’s not like tragedy doesn’t happen on Earth at all. She’d be able to understand that at least, that there are people who come from abusive families or that there are war-torn or poverty-stricken nations. And the weakened resistance only lasts for a short time, so anything that could boost it would be a major help.
As Elyon breaks from her friends and unwittingly becomes her brother’s pawn, Cornelia and Will form a deeper rift. Cornelia blames Will for not letting her tell Elyon the truth, since lying to her worked so well.
There’s a mostly filler battle where the team is shrunk down and stuck in a Terrarium of Evil, but to be perfectly honest, they’re obligated to throw in a battle now that it’s an action series. It kind of slows things down toward the end, especially given how intense the character story went.